The Importance of Alone Time. . .

As we bid farewell to the Year of the Rabbit, I’ve come to realize that a substantial part of 2023 was marked by reflections on isolation and a sense of being distant from family and friends. It was undeniably a “hermit” year for me. However, there’s a spiritual lesson to be gleaned from the cautious rabbit, finding solace in seclusion.

Being a natural hermit, I find healing and hope in solitude. I enjoy immersing myself in creative projects without the burden of to-do lists. Yet, this year was different. The prevailing hermit energy all around heightened feelings of isolation, restriction, and the conclusion of things once deemed good, true, and necessary. Sometimes, the toughest lessons involve discovering what we truly don’t need—a familiar experience for those who’ve undergone rehab or recovery.

The rabbit, an intuitive escape artist, excels in rapid running and expert hiding for survival. Deep within the earth, it senses the vibrations of the external world. Perhaps, the Rabbit can teach us about stillness, connecting with the earth, and patiently weathering chaos through time spent alone in mindfulness and meditation.

When there is chaos, guidance comes in stillness . . . 

^{Dao Life Philosophy}

Setting aside some time alone each day, even if it’s just for 3 minutes or 30, is crucial for digesting and processing our thoughts and emotions. In my clinic, I encounter many individuals harboring hurtful or overwhelming thoughts and emotions throughout their bodies. A significant number of them are go-getters, always on the move without addressing the unseen thoughts lingering in their minds. This is where the mind-body connection, integral to Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM), comes into play. Emotional and physical well-being are intertwined.

Identifying the invisible thoughts and feelings influencing our lives requires time alone, away from distractions. In the quietude of solitude, we confront our thoughts and emotions without external interruptions.

In Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM), each internal organ is linked to specific emotional states. The Liver harbors our anger, the Kidneys respond to fear, and our digestive system is notably impacted by worry and anxiety—hence the term “nervous stomach.” TCM doesn’t separate the mind and body; instead, it sees them as interconnected, and this philosophy extends to medicine. Emotional issues are intricately tied to physical well-being; they are inseparable and treated as such.

This underscores the significance of dedicating time to recognize the unseen thoughts and feelings influencing our lives. Such introspection can’t effectively occur in a bustling office, during dinner preparations, or amidst phone conversations. True “rabbit” or hermit mode requires separating oneself from others and environmental disruptions. It’s in these moments of undisturbed solitude that we confront our thoughts and feelings head-on.

When learning to practice quiet meditation, I recommend mindfulness journals at the beginning. When you first start trying to be still and quiet, up come the thoughts and feelings. As soon at the invisible thoughts and feelings come up, instead of distracting yourself with mindless activity, write the thoughts and feelings down in your private journal. ”I am so mad at . . . . “ ”I feel anxious about . . . . “ ”I’m afraid to tell ____ how I feel. They will just get mad.” 

Capture the thought and emotion that surfaces by putting writing it down. In that act, the invisible becomes visible—almost like magic. What was once hidden is now laid bare on paper. With those stressful thoughts and feelings now visible, you can resume a state of quietude and stillness. Focus on deep breathing and let go of tension. If those thoughts resurface, you’ll find comfort in knowing you’ve already captured them in writing. It simplifies the process of letting them go and returning to the practice of stillness. You can hatch a solution later. Just be still now.

As a tip for calming the mind during mindfulness practice, you can use a few tools to help. Guided meditation is where you listen to someone verbally guiding you with cues on what to do and think about while being still. This can be good practice toward being able to be in complete silence. Many folks use meditative objects to help them practice mindfulness. They will put the object in front of them and just focus and concentrate on the object and their breathing. If thoughts come up, let them go and return to focusing on the object.

Mantras are similar meditation tools. Instead of an object, a repetitive word or positive affirmations are used, like “ohmmmm”. . . . or ” I am at peace with myself”. . . . or you can use one of the 5 Chinese Healing Sounds, (like Sha, or Haa). The sound gives you a focal point and something to prevent other thoughts from coming back after you already wrote them down. This is practicing control of your mind and emotional states. This is definitely a control you want to invest in. Many problems come from unawareness of subconscious emotions. Healing comes when they are felt, recognized, and processed. Quiet mindfulness is really the path to all healing.

In this year of hermitting away like rabbits, let’s identify and confront painful emotions and thoughts from our past. With newfound understanding, action plans can be implemented to take responsibility for our part, resolve communications, and repair broken relations. As we approach the new year, let’s prepare to venture out, applying the lessons learned about ourselves and harmonizing with others. Remind yourself of these lessons with post-it notes or alarms, acknowledging your growth and readiness for the challenges ahead. Embrace the lessons from the Year of the Dragon, armed with mindfulness and the wisdom gained during this hermit-like year. Nature favors those who pay attention—bring it on, Dragon! Just not today! 😄